I started my self loving later than I intended. Ugh. Its getting late. I’m resistant. I felt my little kid pouting on the inside.
Looking at the clock face was inspiring. “Just take your time. Take your clothes off,” I told myself. No pressure to have an extravagant experience, to pull out all the bells and whistles, and insist on Olympic-style solo sex. “It can be simple. Don’t pressure yourself.” I say.
I could hear the voice of a colleague friend in my ear
And then the images of how I might like peel the denim off. Sit on the bed and slide them off my legs? Bend over the side of the bed, push them up over my ass? Stand in the center of the floor and just wiggle out of them? Try to kick them off and wind up standing in a pile of crinkled material? So many options…
I climbed onto my soft fluffy bed, wearing my gray leggings, panties, and bra. 2 things I love: (1) the feel of smooth, nylon spandex leggings compressing my flesh and encasing me from waist to ankles and (2) clean linens fragrant with incense on my cushy pillow-topped mattress all covered by my fluffy down comforter. Like a mermaid, I went swimming in the sheets, rolling around, twisting my body, stretching my legs and arms, letting the fabric caress my flesh. I got a good giggle out all this.
Hanging out with myself in my underwear, I imitated some of the burlesque choreography I’ve been turned on by. I watched myself in the mirror, closed my eyes, and felt myself in motion. I love the adventure of playing with those flicks of my hips or the tilt of my head. When my hand traced the seam of my shorts, I felt the mound of my human animal fur underneath, grabbing my attention, lengthening my breathe, and focusing my attention on the smell of my own musk. I remember smiling and thinking some constellation of thoughts about reveling in each square inch, and this is just the beginning.
I could have done what I do most nights, which is to just drop the garments on the floor and flop into bed and fall asleep. I’m so glad I didn’t. This experiment turned into a steamy striptease created just for me!
You see, the point in this experiment isn’t to find or create a polished shiny jaw-dropping performance. The experiment in this solo striptease was to awaken the parts of me that become electric, magnetic, and free when I feel gorgeous and hot! I felt so decadent with this experiment. That decadence is something anyone can create for themselves if they want it. Anyone can find the moves or the words or the clothes or the scent or the activities that bring them into a state of relaxed excitement, without judging what you look like, just loving how hot you feel. Try it.