Because of the pain in my ass, I’ve been taking my self pleasure slow and intentionally giving myself a down-regulated, slow sensual play experience so as not to over engage my glutes and create more tension.
The last few days, my solo sex time has been a sweet chunk of 20 minutes of self touch in which I made effort to enjoy my body without climaxing. My goal has been to feel the erotic energy in my body, bring it up and then let it subside.
Say we’re working with an arousal scale of 1 – 10.
1 is something like “oh my word, I’m so bored I’m going to sleep”
10 is generally “I am coming right now.”
By myself, I’ve been using this scale to play up to about an 8, which for me is that time when I’m feeling in my body and mind, “I want to come!” Its that moment of knowing that if I keep touching myself this way or I get the vibrator out or recall some of my favorite fantasies, then I know I can climax. But since my ass has been so tight from all the orgasms over the last couple of weeks, I’ve been wanting to just cultivate that erotic heat and swim in it.
Yesterday, for example, I was playing by myself, dancing, moving my body, pulling the hairs on my bush, stroking my vulva, caressing my torso with full hands and soft fingertips, and generally just enjoying my body. When I reached that tipping point moment inside, I brought one hand to my heart and one hand to my belly and took a few deep breaths, to listen and to feel. I heard my belly gurgling, my heart beating, my clitoris throbbing, an ache inside my sex. And in my conscious mind, I invited my erotic mind/body to welcome and revel in this feeling and sensation. I wound up laying there for 10 minutes, slowing drifting off into a trance place between sleeping and waking. When I awoke, I felt amazingly rested, warm, cared for, and ready to get on with my day.